I guess...

I guess I should start to become more active in this thing... I need to start writing again!!



Spring break is over and todays lesson is that... Everybody is somebody. We are all important in this world. A person is a person. :D




I've been going through a lot this past year. I have really grown as a person and have been figuring out the kind of individual that I am. I have definitely been through some rough times and been through a few good times which have come to make me now quite strong.

Although I wear my emotions on my sleeve, I have now begun to process things that I have gone through which has really helped me.

I'm not ashamed of my problems, and I am not ashamed of the mistakes I have made. We are all only human and the tall grass of my path falls as I step in it, it is not already pre-laid.



Love, Kristi

I remember.... Do you?

A day like today is not easy for many people in this world. Mostly the United States because September 11th, 2001 was not a typical day for the average American. Just like every morning on a week day families get ready for the day full of events. Work, school, taking the kids to school and throwing a pop tart in the toaster, barely burning it but eating it anyways because you don't know when you will have time to catch a lunch break at work. Kids wait for the bus to arrive in down town Manhattan wave bye to their parents (and those were the lucky ones) running on the bus to start their days. Public transportation, people of all kinds, shapes and colors all travel together every morning, whether it be a taxi, subway, bus or even their own car all race to their final destination. Soon enough they hit the office, grab some coffee, sort all their papers together, take a seat and get ready to begin their current occupation when tragedy strikes. No, this was not a typical day. The worry of if, "i gotta get home before traffic gets too bad to take the kids to soccer practice" is totally out the window; literally unfortunately. The average American in downtown Manhattan becomes someone else today. They become heroes, they become courageous, they be come frightened, scared, horrified, and grateful. They know what they have to do. They know their only choices. They try to reach home, they try to say goodbye, they try to help other people of whom they never met to survive.

No, this day was not like any other. This day is not a typical day. This day is a day to remember. A day to appreciate. A day to pray, and a day to give. So many people lost so many important aspects of their life's. So many people gained knowledge of appreciation and thankfulness for what they have, what they had, and what they have to remember.

This world is so big. This world is filled with so many problems. So many things are left unnoticed and under appreciated. "My car isn't fast enough, I don't like my clothes anymore, my house isn't big enough, my mother is mean to me, my sister is picking on me" - These things are UNNOTICED. At least your sister is alive! At least you have clothes! At least you have a car! At least you have a mother who loves you and is alive and around! At least you have a home, and a bed and food and a family! Many people in this world grow up and live without all of those things. But that doesn't matter. Not to most people. Because apparently this world revolves for you and your needs and your desires when this world is left with so many people who have nothing and are thankful for the nothing that they have.. But the more people have the less thankful they are for them. But this is not the point just a tangent from the purpose of this post.

9/11 was a loss to so many individuals of this country. So many mothers never made it home, so many fathers will never see their children again; but all of us are more concerned that our shoes don't match our haircut.

Three hundred and forty three firefighters (including those who VOLUNTEERED) lost their life that day. To protect the public. Nobody can be protected from everything, but you can be protected from something. You can be protected by greediness, and hatred. You can be protected from selfishness and inappreciativeness.

Be thankful you have a car to get to work. Be thankful you don't have to worry about the chain of your bike breaking and you're stuck in the middle of some city nowhere near where you need to be. Be thankful you even have a bike to get to work and don't have to walk regardless of the weather. Time stops for no one.

Open the door for the person who is walking behind you. Let the guy behind you order his Starbucks first if you're not in a rush. Go through your closest for all the clothes that you haven't seen for who knows how long and give it away. Buy canned food to give to the county food bank. Give, give, give. Not take. People take too much these days. They take what's in front of them, they take advantage, they take what's not theirs, they take what they want to help them and possibly hurt someone else. Open your eyes. Look at the person besides you. Ask them how their day is going. Don't complain about the small things. Be happy for the small things. Be grateful for the small things. Pray for your country. Pray for the family's who had to change their life and miss someone special and loved from the tragedy of 9/11.

Be who you wish you were. Be the better person. Be what this world needs to make peace and happiness. Be the person who is thankful. Be the better you. A smile is contagious and tragedies are never forgotten but the remind us of how we can all be better people and give.

Nobody is perfect out there but what is so wrong and trying. Of course people make mistakes, of course people only think of themselves sometime. We are only human and I am guilty of all the negative things that I mentioned in this note. But I am also guilty of change and becoming a better person. I am thankful and grateful. I ask random people how they are. I ask what I can do to help. I offer to help some other person’s day go better without benefiting my own. I love my family. I am thankful they are around. I am thankful for my neighbors who have their family. I am thankful for so many people I don't even know for having what they have. For living, for beating, for believing and helping.

Remember those of 9/11. Those people will always be the better side of themselves. Those people know what they have, and what they lost. Those people are heroes; even the ones that weren't in the buildings. The people at home whose families were in the buildings. They are all heroes and I doubt any of them worry about the shirt they are wearing that doesn't match their socks.




Thank you for your time.

Thank you for being alive. You can do so much. You have so much to offer. You have so much to accomplish and make the better of. Just one person can do so much and if this reached anyone I did my part.


Thank you very much,


Kristi Lane

Ordinary

 She wakes up in the morning.  An ordinary day. But what is ordinary?
Foolishness, dramatic and traumatizing events? A day that was just
like yesterday day? Same thing different day. Every time you make a
sand which out of the same things, turkey, provolone, a leaf of lettuce
and two slices of bread does it always appear the same? Does it always
taste as fresh as before? Is it ordinary; are the slices all the same
size, thickness, do they tear? Ordinarily does not exist in this
world. Nothing is normal nothing is ever the same... But yet to her;
in her eyes everyday felt like the same day. She saw the same faces
over and over again. Wake up, feed the dogs take a shower and do all
the feminine things women do to themselves in the morning.  A typical
day. Pop some cinnamon raisin bread into the toaster. Pour your cup of
coffee that you have automatically set to brew as you did your morning
routine. Kiss your husband goodbye as he leaves on his typical day
around the cities. Say goodbye do the dogs and always end up at work
at 7:55 in the morning. Wave hello to your coworkers. Same faces...
Same cubicles, same thing as you did before. Your boss leans in your
office and asks If you have had your coffee yet before he tells you
your first task of the day. Same tasks you were assigned yesterday.
Same tasks you'll be assigned tomorrow...

This day was an ordinary day. But what's next? People ask for change.
They ask for something different and yet when something changes and
something is different all we hear is complaints. Why can't we just be
happy in what we ask for? Why do we feel so weird when things turn out
not so ordinary? We ask for warm weather when it's cold outside. And
we ask for cold weather when it's scorching hot outside. We all live
in a world where we want instant gratification. Please me now or I
won't give a damn. Chase after things until it can work out. Run away
from things that want you. Attract those who show no interest and hide
when they come after you. Why? Why do we want things we can't have and
avoid things that we could have so easily? It could be the chase or
the game. We all love playing games. We all say it's hard to overcome
obstacles and yet we do everyday.
When will we have this world figured out. Why can't we accept the
differences in us all. Is there a right way to live? To breathe? Must
my breaths be as long or as short as yours?

Can I close my eyes just for a minute and just think about myself
sitting next to you? Feeling the air that you touch. Can I just close
my eyes and dream about sinking my toes in the sand and remembering
how I wanted my life to turn out. Are you happy when you think about
living a different life? Can your own not satisfy yourself? Let the
chips fall where they land. We are where we need to be. We breath the
air that we are intended on breathing. Is there more? There is always
more... You just gotta get up and fight for it. Make this day a day
that is not so ordinary.


-Kristi Lane

Circle the Mind

When one may not dream of their happiness

Love and faith is turned to emptiness

Truth is revolving around ones mind

A secret is kept lost and not easy to find

Deep beyound your hearts desire

Too far away no need to reach up any higher

Circle the mind across an endless flight

Carried through tomorrow and far out of sight

Better yet, no good for your command

I sit down now, and I'll never stand

You thought I had it

You thought wrong

I'm just another who wont belong

-kristi